Letter to the husband

Dear husband,

Through the 5.5years that we've been together (from dating days to man-and-wife), you have been away for work on average 2-3 times every year. Durations vary from a few days, couple of weeks to months. The saying goes Absence makes the heart grow fonder and I have to agree with it - especially (if my memory serves me right) on two occasions, your work trips away gave us the distance and time apart from each other that we needed. The time-outs helped us value our space and more importantly, realise how much we still wanted to work hard at keeping the relationship going - and those trips were always well-received as the end results were that we ended up closer, communicated more and well, more in love (again). I remember we used to joke that we were always so in love because we constantly had to restart our honeymoon period everytime you came back on a trip.

Besides those mentioned instances, I never enjoy you being away. Some partners quite enjoy it when their other halves go away, as that translated into time they could do anything that they desired. I was not that type. Our lives were (and still are) so intertwined with each other and we choose to spend time together so much so that when you're not around, I missed you very much. Of course, I'll try to make arrangements with my own friends, but it was not the same without you. I had to get used to your work trips and I dealt with them best as I could.

One of the tougher separations we had to endure, had to be your 3 (or was it 4?) month long trip away when I was pregnant. You missed a whole trimester of my pregnancy and it was not easy. I dealt with it - as I had to - and somehow, carrying a fetus around made missing you, well, easier to bear. Perhaps it was the fact that I couldn't just pine my time away. I had to not only look after myself, but this miracle that I'm carrying. Of course, it couldn't have been any easier for you, but I think everything worked out very well.

Currently, you're only away for 3 weeks. It is practically nothing compared to the other long-haul trips you have made. However, I've never yearned for you to be safe and to be back as hard as before. Besides the fact that we have Kate now, and anyone who knows will understand that having a child is extremely time-consuming and labour-intensive. I'm lucky to have the support of family when you're not around, but it is not the same. Ladle on the fact that our little one has been unwell pretty much the entire time that you've been away, it truly sucks.

This brings me to say my heartfelt thanks to you. You not being around makes me realise how big the vacuum of your presence and contribution is. I cannot wait for you to be back.

Love, me