Muggy Sunday afternoon

Some months back, we brought Kate to Upper Pierce Reservoir. It was absolutely lovely! The winds were blowing and the whole place was terribly comfortable. Last Sunday, the husband and I decided to bring Kate back there again - after we had yummy prata. This time, Kate was alot more receptive to the monkeys roaming around but the winds were missing so it was really hot and not as comfortable compared to the last time.

Kate trailing after the monkey, and the husband trailing after her

"You wait here, ok?" says the little one; who suavely turns around & marches off from me to chase after the monkey

Moments after I took this shot, the monkey jumps off the rock and Kate dashes to my side in fear

After calming her down from the monkey-jumping-off-the-rock, I stand by her side and point out the monkey which was safely at a distance, in the tree

"Kate want to climb tree", she says. So the husband went up and we lifted her up too. She didn't like it very much

But still gamely gave a fishball-faced-smile!

Haha this shot cracks me up. I'm not sure what the husband was picking off her, but it was certainly in true monkey-nature!

Things Kate say

Sunday morning, I was absolutely unable to get up & I told her that I was very tired. Kate, however wanted to get up. So she says to me, "Mommy, wake up already. Don't be tired."

When I finally got up (after she was released from the room), she saw me standing by the bed and walked to me. She rubbed my leg and said, "Mommy, you wake up already? You feeling better?"

Every night, Kate looks forward to drinking her last (sometimes only) feed of milk for the day. She'll exclaim insistently, "I want to drink milk. I WANT TO DRINK MILK."

After she's had her fill, and it's lights out, she will roll around the bed. "Mommy, I want to sleep on your pillow"; I'll have to share my pillow with her. Last night, she was feeling exceptionally loving and caressed my face, while telling me "Good night, sweet dreams" and she gave me a smack on my face. She then proceeded to do it again - and I had my face turned away this time. She then said, while feeling for my face "Give me a kiss!"

The husband encountered a rogue driver the other day and he expressed his exasperation with some grunts. Kate, who was riding in the back said, "Papa, what's wrong?"

When Kate sees me rubbing my nose, or sneezing, or rubbing my tummy (stomachache) she'll ask, "You not feeling well?"

When someone bids goodbye to her, or when she spies us getting changed, she'll ask "where are you going?"

We brought her to the reservoir where we spotted many monkeys. After seeing one, she'll say "we see another monkey, ok?"
When she spied a monkey running off, she turns around to me and said, "I go ok?" (I nod) "You wait here."

Night time, before she goes to sleep, she'll crawl on the bed towards the husband and say "Papa, I want to go gai gai tomorrow"

When she sees you doing something of some/no/high interest to her "what you doing?"
And after we have completed the task, she'll say "you bombom/eat/brush teeth (insert activity) already?"

"Where is my Papa?" (I love the "my")

When I arrive home, usually on the week-day after work. "Mummy, I cannot find you..."

On the weekends, she will tell us "I want to go nai nai house!"

"I want to eat breakfast/biscuit/bread/(fill in food)"

"Don't touch, ok?" she'll say when she doesn't want us to touch something on the table. She'll place it neatly in front of her and it's usually a cup/bowl of food that she doesn't want us to take away from her.

When I was drying my hair, she randomly hopped to my side and said to my tummy "Jake, what you doing? Sleeping? Ok."

Overheard, when she was playing on her own. She's holding a piece of paper and a pen. "I will go here, because... ok! And then, I ..... (cannot hear clearly)... ok? Ok!"

I love how she's developing so well and able to communicate clearly with us (and apparently even to herself, haha). I cannot believe how big she is already!

Being contented

I'm sitting at the computer at 11.21pm. It is really the last thing I should be doing, the first being to be in bed and asleep since I have a 5.55am wake-up call tomorrow. I have to be at work at 7am and of all nights, I'm insomniac tonight. Bad choice of maccas for dinner with awful fries and even worse, coke which is definitely (I'm attributing) the reason why I'm unable to sleep (dumbdumb sugar & caffeine combo is potent for pregnant me who's been off coffee for months).

I gave up sleeping when Kate fell asleep, so here I am. I only have a 15-hour day tomorrow. No sweat (yeah right). I'm already imagining what my lunch is going to be, how I'm going to best utilize my spare pockets of time between where I can find them, and I suddenly thought of my conversation with some colleagues earlier today.

She's a young, ambitious one who is quite a joy. She is not as young, and we get along very well as I suspect we have the same odd sense of humor. Separately, I spoke with them about work, about character, about different stages of life, and I cannot help but think that I have plenty to be thankful for. I think we can never ever be too thankful of what we have.

I'm definitely in a better place today, than I was years ago. And I always think that the husband played a big part in my life plan. After we got together, I became a lot saner (over time), I was then able to concentrate on developing my character through tough training in my last job, and through my experience of being a Mom the past 2 years - all that has made me the person I am today. My teens were terribly turbulent, with me going through self-discovery in the most extreme manners. I was emotionally unstable (not mad, just... dynamic), constantly seeking for thrills (some bad, some not so bad), always wanting more fun and searching for that balance which I never knew I sought. Life then was a constant whirlwind with me partying, making friends, having laughs, loving hard, fighting hard, drinking hard - everything was about fun, and about me. I was so selfish.

Today, I've learnt to let go when it doesn't really matter. I've learnt to be more suave in my decision-making process. I've learnt that growing up doesn't stop. The husband shared Maslow's hierarchy of needs; and say that a huge percentage (I forget the number) get stuck at the level of seeking material needs. I don't think I'm all past it, but I'm more self-aware which to me, is all important. Today, I am contented.

My dose of laughter for today

I ring home.

Kate picks up the phone very quickly, “Hello”

Me: Who is this!
K: MOMMY!
Me: Hi Kate, what are you doing?
K: I drawing
Me: Are you drawing an elephant?
K: NO NO NO I draw playground
Me: Oh, is there a swing?
K: NO NO NO I draw playground
Me: Oh, you drew a slide?
K: Yes.
Me: Is Barney there too?
K: Yes.
Me: What about Kate? Is Kate in the picture?
K: Yes… I cannot find Mommy.
Me: Yes, because Mommy is in the office. I’m not at home.
K: Where is my papa?
Me: Papa is at work.
K: At work?
Me: Yes, Papa and Mama are at work. So you cannot see us at home. We’ll see you later tonight ok?
K: Ok… I WANT SHEE SHEEEEEEE

She puts the phone down on the chair (but not hung up) so I can still hear her

K: I WANT SHEEE SHEEEEEEE (pee in Hokkien. Or it may be a ‘sound’ in baby talk?)
MIL: Lai lai lai (Come, in Mandarin)
K: tham tham (wet in Hokkien)
MIL: (in mandarin) Aiya, you urinated already and it’s wet
K: Oh oh…

HAHAHAHAA so FUNNY!

Which brings me to sharing that we’ve been trying to toilet train Kate for weeks now. She’s been relatively good thus far and we try to not put on diapers for her where we can. Only when we go out-out. She’s not that great in telling us she needs to go pee, though she does go when we bring her every hour or so. She is trained in telling us when she wants to poop.

Oh, I know the husband will laugh when he reads this and I cannot help but grin too. It’s going to keep me going while I put in longer hours at work today.

Monkeying around

The sister did a mini-celebration of her 24th with her best friend - Paul Frank! These are my favourite pics of the day.

Us

So funny! That is Kate's latest monkey face "Angry Bird"

Dear sister, though it wasn't the big bash you'd originally envisioned, I hope you still had a good time. I love how themed we were, perhaps we can do more of such silly stuff soon!
Love, che

Dear Jake

Dear Jake,

Today, you did a ginormous somersault. More than once. So strong that I saw my stomach jump. How cute! I wish Papa will be able to catch more of such you-moments. And Kate cheche too. She's been "talking" to you quite a bit lately; stroking you and having conversations with you. She's the one who tells us you're sleeping or happy or otherwise. Are they true, I wonder? I'm training che che to prepare herself for your arrival. I wonder how it'd all be like when you're here. I'm sure it'd be a ball of fun, a whirlwind of chaos. Whatever it is, Mommy loves you so much. Papa and I count our blessings to have the chance to be your parents. We hope that you're looking forward to being with us as much as we, with you.

Keep growing well, baby little. These two days of sleeping in sure makes me feel more sane and I hope you feel as good too.

I love you.

Love, Mommy

Love-hate relationship

That's the love triangle relationship between Kate, her parents (collectively as one) and the iPhone.

She LOVES it too much. The moment she spots it she will WHINE for it. She will CRY if she doesn't get it. She will nearly do ANYTHING to get it. The bl**dy phone is really a double-edged sword. It provides her with hours of entertainment and she can navigate youtube very skillfully on her own accord; selecting video after video of Barney/Hi5 (her current faces). It gives the husband and I plenty of time to do our own thing; but it is such a pain to take it away from her because she will always cry murder as if her life depended on it. TERRIBLE.

The husband and I decided that this obsession with the phone has got to stop and recently have been more stingy with allowing her to have it. I think it's been days since she last got her hands on it.

Today, she was whining for it (again) and in my exasperation, I said

"Don't have"

K: I want your phoneeee (whiney tone)

Me: No

K: I want your phoneeeeee

Me: Don't have. I threw it away!

K looks at me in horror. Pauses for a split second. And cries out "Don't throw your phone away...... WHY you throw away... *criesssss"

She proceeds to sob in sadness and the next thing I see is her standing over the bin, peering within to try to locate the phone.

HAHAHA I know, it's such a wicked thing to do but I cannot help it! I really wish she will exercise SOME control over the bl**dy device. UGH. But her reaction to the phone's demise was really quite extreme, but cute. Heh.

To the sister

Happy (belated) birthday! You are a beautiful person and mean the world to me. Love aplenty.

"Don't be sad"

The other night, the husband was feeling shattered. His despair was apparent to us, and I really felt for him. I whispered to Kate "go hug Papa, tell him not to be sad".

For the next few minutes, the girl laid on the bed beside her father, hugging his neck as far as her toddler-arms could stretch, and she said to him "Papa, don't be sad.... don't saaaaad". She sat up and rubbed his back, and when there was no response from him, she repeated herself again. "Papa, don't saad, dooon't ssaaaaddd"; while again lying down to hug him.

Thinking back on the episode brings warmth to my heart. It was absolutely lovely to watch, seeing how our child understands empathy and expressing her love to her parent so innocently, earnestly.

I say to the husband, "don't be sad, my love. We are behind you always."

Love is...

Waking up at 2am to help proof-read work for you

Warming up milk at 2am for me

Asking “want to talk?” when the opportunity arises

Staying up to have a chat despite being dog-tired

Making a call to hear your voice, to know how you are, to probe deeper and listen to how you are

Tearing up simply hearing your voice because you mean so much to me

Dropping an sms to say “Love you”, especially when it’s not something done often

Feeling sad seeing you suffer

Wishing hard to take away the pain that you’re going through because I cannot tolerate seeing you like that anymore

Being in tears reading words so sincere, written about a matter so close to our hearts

Feeling it

20 weeks

15 October 2011 - It was a terribly hectic morning; I went up and down from the hospital's lobby to the clinic thrice, the husband drove up and down from CCK to Thomson twice and Kate threw up once.

=_=

But after it all, Kate, the husband and I made it on time and were able to huddle in the little dark room and listen to the sonographer wax lyrical about baby little. Everything is on track, with him being slightly above average for everything (head size, weight, limb lengths etc). And on that day, we confirmed that we will be welcoming a little boy - I will have a son! *happy

Funny tidbit to share: when we knew that we were expecting our first child, we came to a common agreement on one female name only. At that time, I'd guessed (wrongly) that I was expecting a boy. This time, I'd thought that I was expecting a girl (again, wrongly. But I made this guess because my icky symptoms in the first trimester were exactly the same as Kate's); and the husband and I had only managed to agree upon one name for a boy. Both times, though my gut guesses were wrong, we were very lucky to be able to use the only names we had thought of and agreed upon.

The husband and I are very blessed, and it's these little things that make me smile.

Hello baby Jake,

We are halfway through this pregnancy journey and I'm so happy that you're doing such a brilliant job of growing very well. You are very photogenic - we all had a great time watching you bob around on-screen last Saturday, and it was very pleasant to have great pictures of you (we never had such an easy time with cheche). Finally, Papa and I can call you Jake and my only request is that you not sit so much on my bladder - quite an inconvenience.
Another 20 weeks before we get to meet - looking forward, my dear son.

Love, Mommy

Orbs

Same two people, same two outfits, different wedding, a year later. Ha!

Just Kate

Because I cannot believe how adorable, lovely and cheeky she is. How much joy and exasperation and stress and happiness she brings to our lives. How amazing it is that I carried her in my womb and gave birth to her, and how today, she is such a little character full of energy, and such a bundle of joy.

I, me, myself

I had a hectic day yesterday.

After 2 days of break (oh, glorious to be able to sleep in. That little bit helped much!), my day was tragically busy and I was running from point A to B to C and I was rather out of breath by the end of the day. Didn't help that I spent the last 2 hours of the day on my feet.

It was 7pm and I was really knackered and I had this urge to eat pasta. I decided to indulge myself by having a (pricey) $26-dinner of crabmeat pasta, all by myself. I sat there resting my aching back and feet, zoning out and it was an interesting, half-hour of alone time. I surfed the net on my iPhone, I eavesdropped on the conversation between 2 young ladies to my left (I couldn't help myself, they were sitting so close and terribly engaging sharing stories of their complicated, exciting 23-year-old lives!) and I savoured the pasta.

Yums.

It would have been better if I had some company, but it was too last-minute and at the end of it all, I was happy to have filled my tummy with what I craved for. I realise that it was totally indulgent but oh, such simple things in life that I'm able to enjoy because 1/ the husband was home to babysit Kate, 2/ I'm a working mother so I have the spending power to eat what I want (even if it is quite expensive!) and 3/ I'm pregnant and I need to have such mini pockets of happy times to lift my spirits!

Ok, so the 3rd reason is abit bull but not entirely. Heh.

I headed home with a full tummy and spent the next 2 hours playing with, talking to, reading and sleeping with Kate. I guess that's what life is all about!

And since this is a post about me, here's some pics of my bump and I.

Baby little and I, mid August 2011

Baby little and I, 12 October 2011

Another wedding

My cousin is married!

They did the traditional gatecrash ceremony and fanfare on Sat, 8 Oct & the dinner was last night, 10 Oct. Clarice is the same age as the brother and I grew up with her all these years. Her husband is a decent bloke and a terribly sweet one and I'm very happy that they have started this new chapter in their lives. It was also the first time Kate played flower girl! She did pretty well with the guidance of the slightly older kids accompanying her. While I wait for more pics from yesterday from the sister & the cousin, here are 2 I took with my phone.

Us

The parents

My love

"The mattress is so old meh?" I asked, amazed.

"Ya at least man" he said.

Didn't seem that long ago when the husband and I - as a boyfriend-girlfriend couple - purchased a brand new mattress for his room. I'd remembered it as a purchase just before we'd gotten married, but he remembers it as an item upgrade for his room, for us (the old one was rotting anyway). Either way, it led to the next question:

"How long have we been married?"

I say "3 & 1/2 years"

"How long have we been together?"

I think and say "6 years?"

"Wah. That's the longest I've been with anyone."

"Me too!" I say.

It's not the first time we'd had this boliao conversation but it still amuses me. And in this short/long period of time, the husband and I have accomplished pretty well. We had gone on travels aplenty while dating, we had fought and made up many times. We learnt to live with each other's weird habits through the years, and I still think my wedding proposal was one of the bestest in the world. Each time we go for a wedding, we still hold hands and feel each others' love, and I don't really know what he thinks about but I'm always brought back to our own special day and how happy I am that this man is mine.

The husband went for a wedding dinner without me yesterday, and typically, before he goes, he'll comment "so sian to go to weddings without you" and I echo his thoughts. I don't prefer to go to such loving occasions without him either. It's always a nice occasion to renew our love in a small way and always better to have each other around.

Once in a while, when we do things that are a blast from the past, it always feels strange yet familiar. For example, when the husband sent me up the lifts to my mom's when I decided to stay over some weeks back - was definitely before we got married that he last did so. Or when I spy a motorbike and remember his riding days where we were so much more swift on the roads (but also at the mercy of rain). And then there are the newer/recent activities - like visiting the PD with Kate, or purchasing a brand new mattress for our brand new home - which we do with such ease; and I like to think it is because we have both found a comfortable pattern of our new life together.

Talking through sensitive, awkward topics together; understanding each other when there is tension/unhappiness, just talking about random matters and agreeing with each other - always reminds me of how similar our values are which makes us love each other so; consulting each other on whatever matters that come our way, to get a valued opinion or simply to hear a different point of view.

It's the string of events lately that inspired me to post this entry about us, and I think no matter how much we love Kate and baby little; it wouldn't have been possible if there wasn't us.

Love.

Dear baby little

Dear baby little,

This has been a tough week for everyone. Nai nai is not feeling well so we are all a little stressed about the situation. Let's hope that everything gets better, and she feels even better - soon. On a random note, the world is abuzz with the passing of a great man Mr Steve Jobs. Not sure why exactly, but I feel so sad. Maybe it's the mish-mash of illness and fear of passing; of how transient one's life is; how precious relationships are and how we must treasure one another because that's what really matters at the end of the day.

I have been very tired these weeks, and I'm comforted and happy that I have a great family network of support. Maybe it is the "right" thing to do sometimes, but it's really the thought that counts and it means so much to the people who matter.

I'm glad that I have you for company. I remind myself that there is hope in this world, because there are beautiful things taking place each day even as the world is faced with bad news. That is what life is about. Today, I smile because Papa sent me to work when I asked him to. He loves me and knows how tired I am. Today, I smile because I feel you bumping around and growing so well within me. Today, I smile when I see your cheche.

Keep growing well, baby little. Mommy loves you very much.

Love, Mommy

Bonding

... with the family is always a good thing. But oh boy, do I need sleep!

The sister and I too bonded - wearing the same dress in a different colour on the same day, both for the first time!

Happy times

The weekend really tired me out, largely because I was recovering/fighting the flu bug that the daughter shared with me. And with Mom being unwell yesterday, it was really rather heavy. But Saturday night saw us attending a friend’s wedding, a happy occasion and so I’m going to talk about that because the aura lately has been rather grey.

The wedding itself was the usual fanfare and as the groom was the husband’s good buddy, he was involved with the wedding the entire day. In fact, the involvement began weeks ago with the boys discussing the details of the wedding and the preps leading up to the day. What was hilarious was the video that they self-filmed (yes, they did) – I’m sure a link of it will pop up on youtube soon. I’ve seen how this couple were friends, then how they became a couple and finally tied the knot last Saturday.

It was a day of plentiful celebrations, because not only did this couple get hitch, it was also anothers’ wedding anniversary (same day, 6 years ago!) and it’s really quite aawwww to see how the group of friends have matured and evolved to different stages of life cycles – just 3 years ago, I was the one who wedded to this group of pals and have to-date contributed 1.5children to it too!

A terribly cute picture of the girls

Family pic

Kate, the professional yum-seng-er

Get well soon, Mom

Nothing much more to say that that - I really want Mom to feel better soon already. Seeing her in pain (yet pulling a strong front) is so heartbreaking and I wish wish wish she will get better soon. I know she's genuinely happy when she sees Kate though so I'm happy that Im able to provide her that little bit of relief.

Get well soon, Mom. We love you.