Sunday, December 5, 2010

Just gotta try it on for size

Parenting, that's what I'm referring to.

It's one of those things that you'll never know how it's truly done until you try it for yourself. And no matter how hard you try, you'll never know how it'd turn out.

It starts the moment you get pregnant - even before, actually. You gotta prep your body right for optimal fetus growth/development, watch your folic acid intake, quit smoking & drinking... then when you're pregnant you ought to take the right kind of omega-ness etc so that the fetus absorbs all the best stuff from you. You also got to have the right balance of exercise/diet/well-being (mentally, physically, emotionally) so that fetus grows in the best conditions.

After the 9-month journey of incubation, it's a whole new ball-game when the baby's out in the world. I never knew how tough a job can get and how much I can really push myself until I became a Mom - functioning on tight nerves, imbalanced hormones and fatigue. After the initial months, when the baby becomes more independent and responsive, parenting becomes more fun as the baby begins to communicate and interact with you. That's also just about when their already developing personality becomes clearer and it's a challenge trying to manage them.

Manage mightn't be the right word, it's more like hope-I-don't-get-found-out-that-I'm-an-on-the-job-trainee! Tantrums, terribly-twos, bratty behaviour... and years down the line, grades, school, boyfriends/girlfriends, lousy peers who are negative influences...

I guess that's the point I'm trying to make - no one is born to become a parent, nor is anyone totally ready to be a a parent, the ride is unpredictable, stressful, rewarding and unbelievably amazing - all rolled-into-one.

Sure, you can be as ready as you think you are, but when it actually happens, it is unlikely to be similar to what you've read up and tried your best to prepare for. Sometimes, you make the wrong choices (shouldn't have fed her that, it's too sweet/oily/salty; oops she fell because I wasn't watching her; I feel bad for yelling at her, she's only a baby afterall, she doesn't know any better?...) it never ends. But, I think we all try to be the best that we can, and hope for the best. There are, of course, some things that you can watch out for, especially in the areas of discipline - I strongly believe that every child can be taught to behave regardless of how playful he is, and it is crucial that parents instill discipline in their children because a child is not bad by nature, he is spoilt bad.

The best thing? Your child doesn't know any different and you will always be the best parent he has.

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