Things I miss doing

I can't remember what I was doing, but I saw something which made me think of something - of which I cannot recall (don't judge me. It's the mommy hormones that's causing this - hopefully - temporary amnesia!) BUT the point is, it made me want to write about me. Of the things that I miss doing. Just for kicks.

1. I miss taking a leisurely shower anytime I want to.
Right now, I usually take a very hurried shower if Kate is still awake so that I can tuck her in afterwards. Or I take a slightly less hurried shower after Kate sleeps. But this cannot be too long because it's usually past 11 at this point and the longer I stand in the shower, there's a tendency I will fall asleepzzzzz

2. Snacking whenever I want to
So this isn't the most healthy habit, so not such a bad thing that I'm unable to do this, but I do miss just raiding the pantry/fridge at any time of the day and well, just popping choccies into my mouth. And the reason why I can't do this is because obviously I don't have the luxury of time always given that there are people I need to attend to (not myself). But I also have to watch whether Kate is around because this little imp will insist that I share the food with her. And because I don't wish for her to consume unhealthy food items, well, I can't do so (in front of her). Hehe.

3.Sleeping
I used to be a sleep-by 11.20pm and wake-up at 7.10am kinda girl. The husband would bug me to stay up to watch movies with him but I will always try... and fail miserably. I needed my sleep and I really much preferred to sleep early and wake up early. Until Kate came along three years ago and there went my sleep. I miss sleeping uninterrupted, or only waking up when I wanted to. Now, something's gotta give. If I choose to do my own things, then it eats into my sleep (which I always regret the next day). If I sleep, then I end up not doing something (like, clipping my nails or something). Sleep - the last time I remember feeling sleep-deprieved was when I was in secondary school - there was a period of time I remember feeling tired, and sitting at my work-desk doing never-ending homework. And now, I really feel tired. I think all parents must feel this way.

4. Willing my time away
With kids, time is never yours. I'm usually looking after them, playing with them, feeding them, talking to them... well, the moments that I sneak time to play with my phone I do feel guilty. Not good role model behaviour to my child (who I'm trying to not mould into an iChild addict). Gone are the days I can snack and watch tv and shake leg, clip and paint my nails at random, flip a magazine and listen to music quietly, read (I love reading!)... and well, just doing nothing/something/anything that I want at all!

5. Talking to the husband
Before, the husband and I used to talk a lot more. Or even if we didn't talk, it was okay because life was just between us two. Now, we need to make an effort to spend time together to talk. In fact, talking not only becomes necessary because I think it keeps our relationship well, but it's also necessary because there are things that we need to tell the other. Have you fed the meds? Kate was very naughty just now and I needed to discipline her. The kids are going on a playdate this weekeend. Do you need the car cos I need to bring them somewhere... life never stops and I'm the driver to ensure that it all steers according to course. And while I'm quite the natural planner and I don't quite mind being the driver, I sometimes miss just talking to the husband about... nothing much at all.

6. Exercising
It's a lousy excuse but it's true, I'm lazy. I feel all zilch motivation to exercise. Any time I do have I just want to carry Jake or play with Kate or just be at home with them, or bring them out to play. Gotta get my act together or I'll truly flubber away...

Ok. End of random post.